top of page
Search

My Girlfriend Wants an Abortion…But I Don’t

  • Writer: First Step Women's Center
    First Step Women's Center
  • May 17, 2024
  • 2 min read
guy in green jacket staring off and thinking


“I’m pregnant.” 

Those two little words that turn your world upside down. 

“And I think I’m going to get an abortion.” 

Your heart stops for a minute. 

Okay, that makes sense.  

Wait, is that what I want? 

It’s her choice, isn’t it? And I’m supposed to support her… 

But what if you want to keep the baby? What if despite the timing of it all, and the pregnancy far from planned, you find yourself thinking about what it would be like to be a dad. You think I could do this.  

But then you begin to feel lost. What are you supposed to say or do if she is planning on having an abortion? 


Speak Up 

Don’t wait. Tell her how you feel. Let her know that you will support her and your child.  

Although the decision is ultimately up to her, knowing how you really feel about the pregnancy and being a dad helps her make a fully informed choice. It empowers her and you. Leave all your cards on the table. If you want to continue your relationship together – tell her. If you’re excited (and also a little scared) – tell her. She deserves to hear from you because she is making a decision that will impact your life too.  


Be Compassionate 

Ask questions in a kind and thoughtful way to find out why she’s considering an abortion. Don’t judge her responses or motivations. Listen and be a friend. 

Often women who have had an abortion share that they felt like it was their only option at the time. Many of our clients share they don’t think they’ll be supported or have the help they’ll need. They have concerns about school or their job or how they will make it all work.  

If she brings up those concerns, let her know she is not alone. Show her your support and try to understand her point of view. Validate her concerns, then encourage her. Let her know just how strong and capable she is. 


Find Support 

An informed decision is an empowered decision. You both deserve to learn all the facts and find support and care. When you come to through our doors, we will share accurate medical information on abortion and answer any questions you may have about the abortion pill, surgical abortion, and your other pregnancy options like parenting and adoption. We can provide her a free ultrasound so she can learn how far along she is, whether or not the pregnancy is viable, and speak to a nurse about any questions or concerns. 

During your appointment, you can meet with one of our male client advocates to share your thoughts and concerns, and learn more about your role. If she decides to continue the pregnancy, we offer one-on-one mentorship for dads and classes for new parents. We have programs and resources for her too. 


We’re here for both of you every step of the way.  


Make an appointment today. Remind her that there are supportive people in her corner to help her take all the time she needs to make a fully informed choice


 
 
 

Comments


Commenting has been turned off.
 FSWC logo White
First Step Women's Center

Get in Touch

Hours

QUICK LINKS

Monday: 9am-4:30pm

Tuesday: By phone only

Wednesday: 11am-4:30pm

Thursday: 9am-4:30pm

Friday: Closed

First Step Women's Center in Springfield, Illinois is committed to providing you with everything you need to make an informed pregnancy decision. We believe women and men have a right to get evidence-based information from a resource that will not profit from the choices and pregnancy decisions they make. All our services are free and confidential. 

Please note that we can only provide telehealth services to individuals located in Illinois and can provide a state ID. If you do not have a license or identification that shows you are an Illinois resident, we can still provide in-person care at no cost to you.

 

First Step Women's Center is a 501(c)(3) non-profit in the state of Illinois. The information on this site is for educational purposes only and should not be substituted for medical or legal advice. We are committed to protecting your health information. Please be aware that communicating via unencrypted text messaging or messaging services has some level of risk of being read by a 3rd party. While we do not provide or refer for abortion services, we can answer your questions about side effects, what to expect, and more. Contact us to learn more. We proudly serve in Springfield, Farmingdale, Sherman, Riverton, Buffalo, Cantrall, IL and the surrounding areas.

Terms of Use & Privacy Policy | Notice of Privacy Practices

© 2025 - First Step Women's Center - All Rights Reserved

  • Instagram
  • Facebook
bottom of page